This weekend....

It's my Birthday and I'm going to the KC/GB game.  That is all.

How does a simple trip to Walmart come to this?

Ah the holidays.  Lets just call it like it is.  A bunch of crazy people out at once.  So Saturday I stopped by Walmart.  I needed 2 things.  Stamps and manila envelopes.  Something tells me I should of went somewhere else.  It was PACKED.

So 1st I see an accident.  And not just a fender bender.  I was pulling in.  A car was pulling out and didn't see the car going straight that was behind me and one lane over.  He pulled out and was side swiped.  His car doing a 180.  I'm not sure if I'm obligated to stop but I had my son with me so no go.  Luckily no one was hurt and they both emerged from their vehicles to mouth that one word.  Fuck.

THEN as I was looking for a parking spot this woman jumps RIGHT in front of my car and screams "HIT ME".  I could tell she wasn't all there by her fine multi colored clothing and disc man.  Who the F carries a disc man now a days?  Anyway, she stood in front of my car and just stared at me.  I mouthed "NO" to her and she moved on.  Let's just say if my kid wasn't in the car I would of been a LOT less patient with this bitch.

30 minutes later I emerged with my stamp and manila envelope vowing NEVER to go back on a Saturday until Xmas is over.

No one is home.....

Wow.  Did I get myself into some trouble this weekend!  Hope you had a great Thanksgiving weekend.  Here's mine...

Wednesday night:  Take Jax to see Santa.  Go to dinner with Mom and Gma.  Get home early enough to go out and meet friends.  Mom stays home with Jax.  Get drunk.

Thanksgiving: Hurt.  Eat Turkey.  Have pie.

Friday:  Work.  Hit up happy hour with friends.  Get drunk.  Leave awesome drunk voice mail on Chris the Critics phone.  Get home too late.

Saturday:  Wake up late to meet Kristen at 5K Gone Bad at Crossfit.  Buy her coffee to say sorry.  Hurt BAD.  Eat Pizza from McSalty's.  Still hurt.  Have BBQ from Buckingham's.  Still hurt.  Go to bed at 10pm.

Sunday: Breakfast at Ziggies.

I can't handle the sauce like I used to.

She's here but no one is home.  I don't remember taking this picture.....

I'm EXCITED for Thanksgiving!

This is my favorite holiday.  It's got everything one could ask for.  Food, Beer and Football!  On top of that I get to watch Green Bay take on Detroit.

This year I'll be cooking the turkey.  And yes, I rock it.  Every year my turkey turns out fuckin' awesome. 

My Mom and Grandma are coming down and they want to spend as much time with Jaxson as they can.  So my mom is sending me out to get drunk on Friday.  What an awesome mom.  Get out and give me your kid.  I should probably listen to her.  After all she does know best.

So Happy Turkey Day, everyone!

P.S.  Thanks to FB we won't get those annoying Mass Happy Thanksgiving Texts! :)

Black Friday is actually brown.....

Black Friday is quickly approaching.  Some people consider this a 2nd holiday.  Families wait in line for HOURS to POSSIBLY get their hands on a cheap big screen TV or the hottest toys for a dollar.  But big chains are taking all of the fun out of it.  Target just announced they'll be opening at 11pm on Thanksgiving night.  Some stores have announced that they'll be open on Thanksgiving day.  Hence the reason.  Black Friday is now brown.  And speaking of brown the employees of the stores that are opening on Thanksgiving THANK you for shitting on their feast.

I myself will avoid Black Friday.  Yes, the thought of getting a brand new washer and dryer for only $39.99 does sound appealing but I'd rather enjoy my dinner, my wine, my family instead of waiting out in the cold for maybe ONE of the 3 items in stock. 

Instead I'm going to Shop Small Business Saturday.  A GREAT idea from American Express (if I had their credit card I'd use it).  And on top of that I'll be able enjoy my dinner, my wine, my sons 1st Thanksgiving and have a relaxing weekend.  Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

I don't need to see this......

I paid $200 for a concert ticket....

Yep.  Contrary to popular belief we radio people don't get EVERYTHING for free.  So yes, I paid $200 for a VIP ticket to Puscifer (fronted by Maynard from Tool, APC).  I had seen them before and the show was easily my #1 of all time so I knew it'd be good.  This time we opted for VIP Wine Tasting tickets which gave you access to the venue before doors, a Puscifer Bag (an actual WELL MADE bag), and autographed poster, soundcheck and the tasting of 3 different wines from Maynards Vineyard.  Caduceus.  We also got "preferred" seating which was 3 rows back.

The soundcheck was Ok.  They did 2 covers from Fleetwood Mac and I HATE Fleetwood Mac.  So whatever.  The wine tasting was awesome.  Us and 26 other people.  We tried the Diddler (yes, the actual name - LOL), the Chupacabra and the Sancha.  All very good but the Chupacabra was my favorite by far.  Then the man himself walks in.  Maynard.  Wow.  It got awkwardly quiet.  He thanked us for coming and was his usual quiet self.  Photos were strictly prohibited but If I could do it again I would of just asked him.  The worst he can say is no.

Now on to the show.  Puscifer shows are funny.  Maynard makes these videos that go with the show.  Now this tour is called "Conditions of my Parole" so most of the theme was redneck.  The show was awesome.  There is ONE thing that stood out tho.  Before the show there was this couple sitting behind us.  They were obviously hammered.  The guy had no legs and was in a wheelchair.  His lady friend was something to be desired.  All throughout the opener he kept screaming MAYNARD!!  MAYYYYNARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We sat wondering WHY security wasn't doing anything about it.  Was he getting special treatment just cause he was an asshole in a wheelchair???  They let this go on thru the opener and long afterwards.  They had an open bottle of jager.  At one point the woman even got up and asked one of the security people to throw it away for her.  Then it dawned on me.  Maynard always has something going on in the crowd before the show.  Last time 2 band members dressed as popes were in the crowd sitting in peoples seats.  No one even figured it out that they were band members.  People just thought they were obnoxious concert goers doing overboard with the pope outfits.

To me there is NO WAY anyone would of been allowed in a show with a bottle of Jager.  This show was strict.  And the way they were drunkenly going on should of gotten them kicked out a LOT sooner than they did.  So when it finally happened the woman went on a rant.  Screaming on and on about Tool and the fuckin' security.  She was literally 2 feet away from my face and pratically sitting on another dudes lap (who was trying not to stare at her).  At this point she was getting kicked out.  But security STILL let her rant on for a good 2 minutes before hauling her out.  Then she said something that confirmed my belief that she may of been a paid actor instructed to cause a scene.  She said "I just have one more thing to say.  Maynard THANKS YOU."  She looked right at me when she said it.  Why would a random redneck woman say that?  To me it was all staged.  Too perfect.  My boyfriend doesn't believe me but I wouldn't put anything past Maynard.  Dudes always got something up his sleeve.

Either way, totally worth the $200.

It's almost over....

Well my maternity leave is almost over.  I head back to the airwaves of Q102 on November 16th even tho Brock wants my show now.  NEVER! ;p

It's been a wild ride.  More wild than any drunken bender I've ever had.  Ok, well maybe not,but still.  I have a hard time believing that I was even pregnant.  As  a woman who was on the fence about having a kid it's still hard for me to take in.  Of course I look at him and think "wow, so glad I did this"....

Altho I still hate the comments. Here are some of my least favorites.

"Life as you know it will never be the same. "

Really?  I thought the day I had him I'd be out at the bar that night.  Better yet, I had him in the morning so I should of at LEAST been able to make it to happy hour.  Thank you genius.

"You'll never sleep again."

Actually I will.  And I have.  In short spurts but none the less I haven't been up for 10 weeks straight.  On top of that all my friends who have kids who are older have slept.  I have faith that this will change so stop telling me it wont.

"You're a mom now."

Holy shit??!?!  THAT'S what that growth in my belly was.  I was shocked after a human being popped out.

Or when I mention something gross.....

"It'll get worse"

Thank you.  I love the reassuring comment that my son WILL eventually vomit and shit at the same time.  When that day comes I'll be ready but you don't have to remind me.

And to end on a positive note (cause I know my sarcasm sometimes comes off as bitchy) here is my favorite saying!

"I bet you never knew you could love someone so much"

Nope.  I did not see that one coming. :)